Nerves

I'm Nervous.

Master recieved his cutting kit from our friend Max today after a few months of waiting to get the money together for it and tonight I know that he plans on using it on me. This idea while exciting me is one that still terrifys me even more so now as I am afraid that he will be angry if I don't like it this time around when he has just spent a lot of money on the needed tools to add it to our play.

Cutting.

This raises so many feelings inside of me and for the first time in a very long time I am really nervous about playing with Master tonight. I have not felt this way since the first time I allowed Master to tie me up with rope and use me as he wanted back at the house in Gallipoli Rd. That was a long time ago now and I have to admit its kind of nice to feel these nerves about playing again, it makes it exciting and new all over. Apart from cutting I have no idea what else or even if Master has anything else planned for tonight. My brain is running with a thousand ideas of scenea he could do and things he could do me right now that I think I am starting to turn in to jelly. He hasn't told me too but I think that right now I need to go in to the bedroom and kneel in the position he likes me to kneel and just wait for him and focus on my breathing, bringing my energy level down a notch so that I feel calm and can better serve him.

I will try and explore the feelings this topic raises in me in more depth later.

Ra'anna