Fantasy and reality (M/s)

Fantasy and reality, how often do they get mixed up in this lifestyle that we live in? Look how many people come to the scene thinking that a slave should be in chains or caged anytime the Master has no use for her or how many slaves look for Master's that will 'break' them. Sometime the reality is far far different from the fantasy and just sometimes something happens that brings this home again, tonight Master and I had one of those things happens that make you remember reality exists.

Master has a rule, If i am wearing my (His) collar and I want to go to bed I must ask his permission, when he says yes I am to go and kneel next to the bed with my head on the floor until he comes and unlocks the collar and allows me to go to bed. Simple yes? Well I guess thats what I thought too. I have been sick lately and so a lot of things have gone sliding by including some of these rules but today being Masters birthday I wanted to be the perfect slave and so followed them to the letter... the only problem with this is that its 10 degrees outside, I was wearing a short skirt and singlet top and kneeling on a hardwood floor. I waited... I waited some more and then some more thinking that Master was only a moment away but reality interfered and Master bacame distracted, 40 mins later I was still kneeling waiting and shivering, almost in tears and starting to think really bad mean unslave like thoughts about the things I wanted to do to Master while on the other hand focusing on my breathing and repeating over and over 'I am a slave, I suffer for my Master's pleasure and this brings me pleasure' the breathing and affirmation helped me ignore the bad thoughts and cold mostly but now as I lay here snuggled in bed under the warm feather doona and the heater going to warm me up I have got to thinking.

Did I infact do the right thing. On the surface yes I was following Master's rules but on a deeper level I was putting myself in danger and thats not a good thing for any slave to do. Should I have infact taken responsibility and got out of position to go and find Master and see what he wanted me to do, was I clinging to the fantasy of being the 'perfect' slave while ignoring the reality that it is a freezing cold night and I am already sick.