Life moves and changes sometimes in little ways sometimes in much bigger ways. My life has done a lot of moving and changing in the last six months but I am glad for the changes, I have learnt a lot in that six months, I have learnt to stand up for myself, I have learnt that its okay to be independant even though I am a slave. I have learnt that I often misjudge myself and my abilitys and that I am a much stronger person then I often give myself credit for. I have learnt that I can be loved without having to earn love, I have learnt that I can love and give myself to someone and that the fear of getting hurt can go away.
Yes being loved and giving myself to someone is a wonderful thing. What is more wonderful is hearing Master telling me that I am his girl now, that I belong to him and that he loves me. Yesterday he collared me which means that I no longer wear his consideration collar, now I am his for real and I know that his not just going to get rid of me. When he locked the collar around my neck it felt so good and so overwhelming that I coulnd't find the words I wanted to say and Master thought that I wasn't happy. I am happy infact more then happy but the act of him locking a collar on me sent me so far in to my slave mind that I couldn't string words together to express how I felt. It felt so good and so right and still does today. I had forgotten what it felt like to feel so loved and wanted.
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